Support for Parents and Carers
Support for parents and carers of boys, teenage boys and young men.
Parents and carers often notice when something has changed, even when it is hard to know exactly what is happening.
This might include anger, withdrawal, anxiety, low confidence, changes in mood, difficulties at school or college, friendship concerns, online pressures or a reluctance to talk.
This page is intended to help parents and carers think about what may be happening and what kind of support might help.
What Parents May Notice
Many parents and carers find themselves asking questions they did not expect to ask.
Why is he so angry?
Why has he become withdrawn?
Why has his confidence changed?
Why does he spend so much time alone?
Is this part of growing up, or is something more going on?
These questions do not always have simple answers.
They do not always mean something is wrong.
Changes in mood, behaviour, confidence or communication can happen for many reasons, and it can be difficult for parents to know how best to respond.
Understanding what may be happening beneath the surface can help parents and carers respond with more confidence, care and clarity.
What May Be Happening
Boys, teenage boys and young men can experience pressure in different ways.
Some changes may be linked to development, friendships, school or college, family life, identity, confidence, relationships, online life or expectations about masculinity.
Some young people talk openly about what they are experiencing.
Others may become quieter, more withdrawn, more irritable, more anxious, or express distress through behaviour rather than words.
This does not always mean that something is seriously wrong.
However, it can leave parents and carers feeling concerned, confused or unsure how best to help.
Common Challenges Parents Notice
Parents and carers often get in touch because they have noticed changes in a boy, teenage boy or young man.
This might include:
Increased anger or irritability
Withdrawal from family life
Low confidence or self-esteem
Anxiety or excessive worry
Friendship difficulties
Spending more time alone
Lack of motivation
Changes in mood
Difficulties at school, college or work
Uncertainty about the future
Often, these challenges are connected to deeper questions around identity, belonging, confidence, relationships and finding a place in the world.
Why Boys Don't Always Talk
Many parents and carers notice that a boy or young man who once talked more openly may become quieter, more private or harder to reach.
Some boys and young men find it difficult to put feelings into words.
Others may worry about being judged, misunderstood or seen as weak or vulnerable.
Emotions may sometimes be expressed indirectly through silence, humour, avoidance, frustration, anger or changes in behaviour.
This does not mean that parents have done something wrong.
It may simply mean that the young person needs time, trust and the right kind of support to begin making sense of what is happening.
Anger Is Not Always The Whole Story
Anger is often the emotion that parents and carers notice first.
For some boys and young men, anger may sit alongside feelings such as anxiety, embarrassment, disappointment, confusion, shame, loneliness or low confidence.
Understanding what may sit beneath the anger can help parents and carers respond with more confidence, while keeping connection open during difficult moments.
This does not mean ignoring behaviour or removing boundaries. It means trying to understand what the behaviour may be communicating, while still holding clear and appropriate limits.
The Impact of Online Life
Online life can be a significant part of growing up for many boys and young men.
Social media, gaming, online communities, influencers and constant comparison can all shape confidence, identity, relationships, body image, expectations and ideas about masculinity.
Online spaces can offer connection, entertainment, learning and belonging.
They can also create pressure, comparison, confusion or unrealistic expectations.
Understanding these influences can help parents and carers respond with curiosity rather than panic, and think about what kind of support may be useful.
When Additional Support May Help
Many changes in mood, behaviour or communication can improve with time, patience, support and healthy relationships.
Additional support may be helpful when concerns persist, feel difficult to manage, or begin to affect family life, school, college, work, friendships or emotional wellbeing.
Therapy or counselling can offer a safe and supportive space for a boy, teenage boy or young man to talk, reflect and make sense of what is happening at a pace that feels manageable.
Parents and carers are also welcome to get in touch if they are unsure what kind of support may be appropriate.
Common Questions from Parents and Carers
Why is my son so angry?
Anger is often one of the emotions parents and carers notice first. Sometimes anger reflects frustration, stress, embarrassment, anxiety or feelings that are harder to express. Understanding what may be happening beneath the anger can help parents respond more thoughtfully.
Why won’t he talk to me?
Some boys and young men become more private as they grow older. This does not necessarily mean they no longer value the relationship. Some find it difficult to put feelings into words, while others worry about being judged, misunderstood or seen as vulnerable.
Is it normal for boys and young men to become withdrawn?
Some withdrawal can be part of growing up, especially as young people develop independence and spend more time with friends, hobbies or online activities. However, significant or prolonged withdrawal may sometimes suggest that additional support could be helpful.
How can I help him build confidence?
Confidence often develops through positive experiences, healthy relationships, encouragement and opportunities to overcome challenges. Listening, showing interest and recognising strengths can all help support a young person’s confidence over time.
How does online life affect boys and young men?
Online life can offer connection, entertainment, learning and belonging. It can also create pressure, comparison, confusion or unrealistic expectations around success, appearance, relationships and masculinity.
When should I be concerned about his mental health?
It may be worth seeking additional support if changes in mood, behaviour, confidence, anxiety, withdrawal or relationships persist over time, significantly affect daily life, or cause concern for the young person or those around them.
Can therapy or counselling help boys and young men?
Therapy or counselling can offer a safe and supportive space for a boy, teenage boy or young man to talk, reflect and make sense of what is happening. Every young person is different, and support can be adapted to their individual needs.
How do I arrange support?
The first step is usually an introductory conversation to discuss your concerns, understand what is happening and explore whether therapy, counselling or another form of support may be an appropriate next step.
Looking for support?
If you are concerned about a boy, teenage boy or young man, or would like to explore whether therapy or counselling may help, you are welcome to get in touch.
I offer an introductory conversation where we can discuss your concerns and consider the most appropriate next steps.